Creativity Strikes In the Middle of the Night

So, this is just my late-night attempt at some poetry. Don't read into all of these. I don't write from my own perspective all the time! It wouldn't be creative if I did :)

Short Poems by Amanda Phillips

Warm honey

My heart in a basket

Carry it easy

Cover it

So it stays warm

The cold hurts

Don’t just leave it by the door

Take it inside

Before the bears come

They like the smell of honey

And it’s sweet for you now

Don’t let it crystallize

That means it was forgotten

Dark Circles

I don’t need kind words from you

Just a kind tone

A tone that says

I love you

Musical, perhaps.

A tone that says

Stay with me

Even though my words fail me

And the dark circles under your eyes

Say they still need me

Because I put them there

To mark you as mine

I would rather have to listen for the tone

Than feel your love

Storms

Rushing wind

Shades of grey

But I’m okay

With your hand touching mine

Not even holding

Just near

Rock

I heard you say

That you thought I was okay

But that must be play

Because I’m sure they told you my ways

How I spend the days

Rocking back and forth

Listening for my own thoughts

Waiting for silence

That never comes

They told me to leave you

And I said I never knew

How I could be that untrue

But that was before I knew to use

And now you must excuse

My rocking back and forth

I’m still listening

Because they are still there

With me always

I guess they’ll never go away

Those voices I hear say

That today is the day

To end my never-ending praise

Of my own quiet ways

So I’ll just be rocking

And listening for them

To speak to me again

How comforting

To know they’re there

Cosette Playlist

I've told a few people about a playlist I made for one of my classes. It was actually the same class that I made The Yellow Wallpaper picture for. The assignment was to create a playlist that describes your favorite character in literature. I hope you are realizing how cool this class was. I kind of wish I hadn't taken it freshman year, because it totally spoiled me for what a good English class at UNC should be like and it was taught by the head of the English department here. Most have not been up to par with this class, and the budget cuts didn't help any. Anyway, I chose Cosette from Les Miserables because it's one of my favorite classics of all time, and I thought I could come up with the best playlist for her out of all the characters in the novel. The songs I chose are meant to describe her life from the time her mother sent her to live with another family to the time she realizes how wrong she was to turn away from Jean Valjean. There is a more detailed description of the reason for the song choices and the links to the songs on this page. The songs I chose were:

"Welcome to the Cruel World" by Ben Harper

"Good Times Gonna Come" by Aqualung

"I Will Follow You into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie

"End of Our Days" by Howie Day

"Open Your Eyes" by Snow Patrol

"Kiss Me" by Sixpence None the Richer

"Good Woman" by Catpower

"Where I Stood" by Missy Higgins

Another cool thing about posting this playlist is that it totally represents my favorite kind of music for the most part. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love plenty of other kinds of music including country (there's just something about summertime and country music), rock, rap, etc., but if I had to pick one song to listen to for the rest of my life it would probably be something by Missy Higgins. Let's hope my life isn't that repetitive, but you get the idea.

Chapter 1

So, I went home this weekend and although it was a short visit, I did find the inspiration to write chapter 1. Laying on a blanket outside under the trees that are starting to turn was the perfect setting for me to give life to a story.

It took me a little while to get started, but I made myself make an outline first and plan out all the major plot twists in the novel. I can already see the characters forming and the story seems to be writing itself, as often happens when I write. Until now, I've only written short creative pieces, so this is a really big leap for me. What I have learned so far is that I don't think I need to worry about planning out all the little details, because they will come to me as I write. I have established the relationship between the main character and his father, which I need for the background of at least the first half of the story. I wrote all of this freehand, so when I type it up, I will probably edit the chapter again. There's just something about writing at home though that begs for me to use a pencil and paper. It reminds me of the years and good times I had writing as a child. When I was younger, I definitely read a lot, but I probably wrote just as much. I miss having the time to do both of those things as much as I used to. Taking childhood for granted... it never fails. Okay, well that's the book update. I'm in class on Sunday right now, so back to paying attention for a little while. I'm really excited, everyone! Keep reading :)

My Book

Okay, I have decided I'm going to write a book. Seriously. I'm going to make time to sit down and write. Most people's reactions have been, "Well, that's awesome! I mean, if you have enough time to do something like that, go for it." The truth is, you have to make time for what you care about. Everyone knows this if they think about it. We make time to hang out with those we care about. We all know that if we decided to work out and stay fit, we take 30 minutes out of our day to do so. I'm going to spend at least 3 hours a week writing. I'm going to keep it fun, so it's not like another responsibility or a job, but I'm going to think of it as free time. I'll spend it exercising my imagination.

The reason I'm telling you guys this is because I'm going to keep you all updated on my journey to becoming a novelist. It's going to be a fiction novel and so far I have an outline. For the sake of keeping my ideas private, I'm not going to reveal the gist of the story, but I am going to keep you posted on how far I've gotten, character development, struggles I have to overcome, etc. Please stick with me on this! I need support to keep going. I know it's going to be hard... I've tried before but I've never had an idea this good and I've never been this resolved. I believe I have reached a point when my writing skills are good enough and they will only improve on this journey. Stick with me! Free copies to all that read and comment when I get published.

I will reach this goal, readers. Just wait and read.

Book progress to date:

• outline started
• main characters decided upon
• plot twist decided

Next step:

• complete chapter by chapter outline
• begin writing
• develop main character
• develop setting

More to come soon! Don't worry, I will still post other interesting stuff too:)

Movie Mondays: My Top 3

My roommates and I have dubbed Mondays "Movie Mondays", in hopes of making this horrible first day of the week more enjoyable. Tonight was the first night of this fabulous, new tradition and the first movie on the list was "Love Actually". I don't know how much of the movie we actually watched, since the night turned into more of a social event than anything, but the point was to bring us all together for fun anyway.

But this got me thinking about the next movies on the list. Since I live in an apartment full of girls, it's safe to say that most of these viewings will be of sappy love stories and romantic comedies. Some timeless favorites of mine are:

1. When Harry Met Sally

If you haven't seen this movie, it's a great one to sit down and watch with your mom. I can just about guarantee that she's seen it and loves it. The classic diner seen may be a little awkward if you are younger, but watch it anyway. No one does New Year's Eve like Harry and Sally!

2. Pride and Prejudice

This one is for the Jane Austen fans out there, or for those that just love a good "chick flick". It's hard to beat the classic story of Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett. You can see from one of my earlier posts that I love to watch this one. If there's a rainy afternoon when you can't think of anything better to do than immerse yourself in one of the greatest love stories ever told, spend a couple hours with these two. It will probably ruin real life love for you, but maybe it will just help you keep your standards high, ladies!

3. The Notebook

You probably knew this one would be listed from your first glance at this post, but there's good reason for it. It's been over-watched by millions of us, to be sure, but it will always bring a tear to your eye. It's fun, exciting, and, let's be honest, we all wish for a love like Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gossling share in this film.

Okay, that's the end of my girly ramblings for the night. Girls, watch these and see if you agree with my top 3. Guys, pick any of these three to watch with your lady on date night and I can guarantee cuddling:)

The Yellow Wallpaper

For those of you that have read this crazy short story, you will understand this picture. For one of my classes freshman year, we had to create an image interpreting a story that we were interested in. This was mine:

Here's a link to my portfolio for that class. This is definitely my favorite that I've taken since being in college: Literature and the Other Arts. I learned so much and loved the whole class!

My Portfolio

Penny Passions

I keep my passions

in my change-purse

collected together as if

they are all the same.

I keep them snapped in tight

instead of scattered

untidily, offensively

all around.

I would not want

to get my change

mixed up with yours

because there would be

too much to sort through.

Mine are copper to your silver;

too tedious to count and trade in,

too insignificant to do anything other

than collect.

But my penny passions are mine.

And my jar is nearly full.

"Don't wish your life away"

I'm not wishing my life away, anonymous-person-who-is-older-than-me. I just want to be out of college. And yes, I can hear you, person-who-still-wishes-for-college-life. I know you're saying that "college is the best time of your life". College is pretty great, but all I have to say is, I sure hope not. I hope the best time in my life is when I have finally reached the goals I have set, one of which is to graduate. I look forward to not having to worry about my freaking GPA for a change. All I have done my whole life is school. I will always "do" school though, since I plan to be a high school English teacher, but I'm ready to be the one grading. I'm excited to have my own house, start a family, and live for my family and not for school. My priorities have changed over the years. At some point my tunnel vision for school dissolved and I was able to see the landscape of life around me.

Now don't get me wrong; I love learning. I'm a fan of school and being educated, but I don't understand why years and years of education are required to get a job now. I'm sure it has to do with the economy, but even before the economy started its downward slope, "college," as one of my friends worded it, "has become the new high school and grad school is the new college".

Wouldn't it make more sense to expedite the education process if so much more education is required for a good job, rather than making people spend a third to a quarter of their life in school, just to make a decent living? What about doubling up the middle school grades? Put third and fourth together and fifth and six together. We are already moving to the year-round school system, so why not learn more as well. Just a thought. Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this. Maybe I burned myself out by going to a high school that felt like college. I'm a junior and I feel like I should be finished. Two more years. In the meantime, I'm going to work on another way to make money.

In class...

Okay, so this is more of a rant than a rambling, or maybe a little of both. Anyway, my teacher, who by the way may possibly be the most depressed woman in the world, decided to critique the students' writing style today. Now, this seems perfectly acceptable considering that she is a teacher and we are students here at University to learn and become better at everything we do here. The problem I have with this is that she was uprooting the style of writing that all of us have learned at this school. When we took the intro writing classes that are required at this university, we were told that some things may have to be tweaked for each subject, but basically, the way they were teaching us to write would serve for all classes. Now, this teacher, who has us writing two page simple character analysis papers is telling our whole class that we need to change everything about our style of writing. Introductions don't need to be even close to paragraph; they need to be a couple sentences detailing what you are writing about without giving all your interesting tid-bits away. Okay, this I can see as being an understandable change as it's just her preference. Also, we need to be using at least two footnotes per paper. This is a completely stylistic writing choice that I do not believe, nor what I taught, that there should be a quota on. If you need a footnote, which you probably rarely will, make one. My other teachers have actually asked that we avoid them, if necessary, because they are generally used in longer research papers, not two page analyses. And though there were many other little stylistic changes she requested, I can't remember them all because I pushed their ridiculousness out of my mind. Perhaps, I am annoyed because I am an English major and she's not even in the English department and the changes she's asking for do not follow any official format such as MLA or APA. Perhaps I'm annoyed because her requests make no sense. As the saying goes, "I'm not happy about it, but I'll do" ...because I have to so I can make an A.

Pride and Prejudice

Dear Elizabeth Bennett,

I envy your simple ways of living, with the only distraction being the gossip of your neighbor and your preoccupation with Mr. Darcey. Though it seems so complicated and stressful to you, you have a wonderful life full of love and excitement and a wonderful outcome awaits you. So don't worry, Mr. Darcey loves you and everything is going to work out wonderfully.

It seems to be clear that you are prejudice and your dear Mr. Darcey is pride. Or at least that is how the novel begins... I ask you, why are you so quick to judge him? Is it that unfathomable to think that someone of his rank would be a modest man, afraid to share his feelings with someone such as you? Well, I suppose it all works out for you in the end. Perhaps you judge him quickly because other men have let you down in some way? But that doesn't seem right, you have a loving, honest relationship with your father. This doesn't seem suited for a Freudian psychologist, I suppose. Perhaps you have trouble imagining a happy outcome for yourself? This is most likely, for you are modest as well.

That is all, for now, my dear Ms. Bennett. Good luck in your attempt to understand Mr. Darcey throughout the rest of this movie. I already know what will happen, but you do not. Oh, the irony.

Yours truly,

Me.

Welcome!

I have decided a blog would be an awesome way to get out the thoughts that I don't otherwise reveal, mainly because no one I know would really be interested in these ramblings. So, for those of you that do find the depths of my mind intriguing, all the better, and if you have anything you have been thinking about a lot lately, feel free to share! I always love any new fact - or fiction for that matter :)